ADHD in Children - How to Get Your Child to Listen to You - Part 1

The Problem: Your child is not listening to you. He is not honoring your first request or complying with your wishes.  

Parents most common question is "How do I get my child to listen to me?"  

This occurs in three main stages depending on your child's hyperactivity and your (his parent's) reactions.  

Stage 1: Passive Noncompliance  

The first is what we call passive noncompliance.   

Here's what it looks like and feels like: Your child is not really defying you and saying NO. But he isn't jumping up and doing what you ask, either. So this leaves you nagging and reminding gently, or not so gently.   

Some mothers have to remind their children 5-20 times to get ANYTHING done. Apparently their child decided "If mom is going to say it 20 times, I might as well ignore her the first 19 times. That gives me more time to do this thing (I like better than that thing she wants me to do).  

Here's what your child does. It almost seems as if he cannot hear you. Yes, he hears you; it's just that he would rather pretend he doesn't so he can wait to mind you.  

Here's what to do: Learn the 5 ways to attract your child's attention. Otherwise he will keep ignoring you, because he can.   

1. Limit your side of the talking to 6 seconds. Stop the long, nagging, and gentle reminding.  

2. Show your child what is in it for him when he complies. For example, if you want your child to tidy up his room, rather than nagging and threatening, try this instead. Get the kitchen smelling great  by cooking something he likes.   

3. Use pre-warnings: Come to his room and say:  

"20 minutes till dinner. Mmm! mashed potatoes. Room check in 15."

"15 minutes till dinner. Room check in 10. Check under your bed." 

"10 minutes till dinner. Room check in 5 minutes. Check the side of your bed. Mashed potatoes when your room's OK."

"5 minutes till dinner. Room check. Dinner when room's OK."   

Check the room and list what is left to be done. For example, "As soon as you get these dirty clothes put away, let me know you're ready for a check." Your child MUST see what's in it for him or he will not comply. Nagging is not a big threat. Missing mashed potatoes is. :)  

The MOST IMPORTANT to do is get started, because this WON'T go away by watching and waiting.  

You Can Improve Child Behavior  

If now is a good time to get your child's attitude and behavior under control, I invite you to use these parenting tips to get started. If you want more tips, I invite you to claim your free report "Seven Simple Ways to Get Your Child to Listen to You!" You can download it when you sign up at http://www.AdhdParentingTips.com It explains the methods I used to transform my son's ADHD/ODD behavior from out-of-control to almost normal in 3 weeks. You also get 3 free videos: "How To Prevent Temper Tantrums." The sooner you start this, the easier it is to help your child. You CAN do this.

From Debra Sale Wendler - Respect Effect Mom and Respect Effect Parenting at http://www.AdhdParentingSuccess.com